Principle 1 - Exercise the Freedom to Choose Your Attitude

Welcome to the PRISONERS OF OUR THOUGHTS conversation series.
I'm glad to "see" you and look forward to getting to know each of you over time as we explore finding deeper meaning and fulfillment in life and work.

Let me start by having you think about a couple of questions:

Why do some people seem to have an easier time dealing with complex and challenging situations than others?

Why do some people seem more capable of dealing with change than others?

Recently, we have all had the opportunity to witness these differences, seeing the power of the human spirit in the worst of situations. It is timely that we start this series by exploring the first of Viktor Frankl's core principles:

PRINCIPLE 1: EXERCISE THE FREEDOM TO CHOOSE YOUR ATTITUDE---in all situations, no matter how desperate they may appear or actually be, you always have the ultimate freedom to choose your attitude.

"Everything can be taken from a man but---the last of the human freedoms---to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's way." ---Viktor Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning

PUTTING MEANING INTO THIS CONVERSATION...
I'd like know what you've experienced ... and observed in your work and everyday life. Recall a situation in which you consciously exercised the freedom to choose your attitude about it. This could even be your current situation or one where you were confronted by a co-worker or difficult boss or unexpected change in the past. What was your initial attitude? How did it change? Did you actually "do" anything to change your attitude? If you have a difficult time focusing on yourself at first, think about your observation and inspirations of others that might help us all apply this principle in our own lives.

Talk with me. I look forward to learning from your thoughts and experiences.

All the best,

Alex

_____________________________
Alex Pattakos, Ph.D.
author, Prisoners of Our Thoughts
founder, Center for Meaning

Comments

[Karol Feld]

Dear Dr. Pattakos,

I'm glad I found this Blog! While writing my own blog on the importance of Choosing the Right Attitude I discovered this site. Please check: www.TeensSelfHelp.com and my blog www.TeensSelfHelp.blogspot.com. Isn't it great to discover that it's really all up to us to choose the right attitude, to learn to be happy and to learn to find meaning in our lives?

Love,

Karol

[Alex Pattakos, Ph.D.]

Dear Karol,

My apologies for the delay in responding to your meaning-full comment. I've been traveling a great deal and unfortunately, this has been my first opportunity to write back.

I'm glad you found this blog too! It appears you are doing wonderful work.
I wrote an article, "Train of Thought" in Youth Lifestyle magazine. It is posted on my website in the MEDIA ROOM. You might find it of interest.

http://www.themeaningdifference.com/

Thanks again for stopping by!

All the best,
Alex

[Karol Feld]

Dear Dr. Pattakos,

Thanks for responding. I checked your great website and the article "Train of Thought." I will buy your book too. It's exciting to know that there are people like you trying to make a difference! Thank you. Your messages will help me inspire my students and others. Take care!

Blessings,

Karol

[Alex Pattakos, Ph.D.]

Dear Karol,

Thank you for your very kind post! I'm glad to hear that you visited our web site and will read my book, Prisoners of Our Thoughts. I not only hope that you find it meaningful to you personally but also that you will be able to apply my meaning-centered principles with your students.

I also visited your web site and am impressed with and inspired by your work! Please let me know if I can be of any assistance to you.

You'll be interested to know that I have some very fond memories of my time spent in Costa Rica, including San Jose and the University of Costa Rica. In addition, since it appears that you live in Pennsylvania (see, I did visit your web site!), I thought that you should know something else. Besides spreading my meaning message around the world through my public speaking engagements, I'm collaborating with an Emmy Award-winning team at Penn State Public Broadcasting to produce a full-length documentary film, based on the principles described in my book, for the Public Broadcasting Service (PBS). I plan to post updates on the status of the film on our web site and via the Global Dialogue Center, so stay tuned!

Thanks again for your interest, support, and meaning-full work! I look forward to hearing from you again soon.

All the best,
Alex

[J.D. Meier]

I choose my attitude daily. I can't always choose what's on my plate, but I can choose how I eat it.

Knowing these distinctions has served me well:
- the most important meaning maker is yourself (it's your lens on your life; you're the director and you get what you point your camera at)
- our thoughts control our feelings
- own the gap between the stimulus and the response (emotional intelligence)
- know how anchors/triggers work -- for example, playing a favorite song, or finding a favorite spot.
- know how to rewrite your stories you tell yourself to be more resourceful

A couple of the most suprising things for me are:
- Asking questions changes focus changes attitude
- Counting what counts really works -- the simple act of reviewing daily accomplishments, helps balance the weight of the backlog (the undone)
- asking solution-focused questions is a simple but effective way to put me or my teams into their most resourceful state
(see solution-focused questions - http://blogs.gotdotnet.com/jmeier/archive/2008/01/02/solution-focused-questions.aspx)