In many ways, I'm certain that we would all agree that WOMEN continue to be blazing a trail for themselves. No doubt we've come a long, long way, but as our opportunities expand and new doors include an invitation to enter, we have to also realize, that every move we make, can also widen or narrow the path for the women that will follow. What we do matters, not just for us, but for other women.
Thinking beyond oneself is a discipline that a dear mentor taught me. Opportunities constantly offer us ways to share our gifts and the measures of success come more by our ACTIONS than by our words. Our influence, whether it be expanding the path, or narrowing it, is guided by what we do and how others perceive what we do.
Some of my best leadership and life lessons have come from three sources: 1) personal experience, 2) wisdom of mentors and teachers, and significantly, 3) from observing other women in ACTION. I've learned from both the shining examples of greatness in women's leadership and also from those who have fallen short, many times for reasons we can't explain.
Since Governor Sarah Palin announced she was quitting her job as the elected Governor of Alaska, there has been quite a fury of media activity. Without judging her decision, it has prompted me to think about what I've learned over the years as a woman leader about "the Art of QUITTING."
I wanted to share four key lessons with you. Perhaps, we can use this conversation as a springboard for an exchange of ideas, as I imagine you, too, have learned about quitting from your own journey.
1. QUIT at a HIGH POINT
One of my mentors encouraged me to never leave an assignment until I had really accomplished something visible and at best, enduring in some way. He also suggested that I needed to allow adequate time to LEARN what was there that would expand my value as a leader ---- and to LEAVE what was in my care in better shape than when I arrived. Sometimes this is tough to do when the situation is demanding or circumstances are not favorable for success, but most of the time, I've found this to be wise counsel. It doesn't mean you have to accomplish everything you hoped to do, but it is vital to be able to define not just the responsibilities you held, but the RESULTS you achieved that made a difference. If you do this, it requires no exaggeration, spinning, excuses, or much self-congratulation. EXCELLENCE shines on its own. It's memorable. This creates a win, win, win, win. Your self-esteem benefits; your resume and track record are enhanced; the organization is ahead, and you strengthen women's leadership legacy by your action. You will also feel real GOOD inside.
2. CONSIDER IMPLICATIONS THAT IMPACT OTHERS
Sadly, I've seen women QUIT on a whim. They REACT. They make a SCENE. They MOBILIZE without thinking through the consequences for their own future, everyone around them, the organization, and sometimes even the potential impact other women's advancement, at least for while in the wake of their haphazard decision. Seemingly thoughtful, small changes in your approach to quitting can minimize this happening to you, even when you've truly got to go! Go out in a graciously. Leave on the highest note possible. Be an example for others of how to QUIT with grace and gratitude. Know that those looking to you for leadership, even in perhaps the most difficult circumstances seen by all, will benefit from your BIG leadership example. "Soft overcomes hard. Slow overcomes fast. Let your workings remain a mystery. Just show people the results." -- Lao Tzu
3. TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR QUITTING
Before QUITTING, most of us have had many things that led us to the decision. It's easy to want to point your finger, blame, complain, and paint a picture that easily translates into being a victim of someone else's behavior. Telling everyone who will listen about your grievances is rarely helpful either. People that are staying, don't want to hear it. They have to continue to survive. Being a victim isn't attractive. Blaming others is transparent to others. Quit because it is right to do. Bad mouth no one; this is part of going out with grace. Remember, no one can give you your FREEDOM. You have to take it. Take responsibility for your decision boldly and with authenticity.
4. YOU CAN ALWAYS CHANGE YOUR MIND.
One time, I accepted a job with a client that I knew was not good for me. It was going to stretch our staff very thin and the work was going to be impossible --- and the client, very demanding. Because I am the RESPONSIBLE type, I was sick over my decision. A dear friend called me. I asked for her advice. She had just read one of Oprah's "What I Know for Sure" columns in O Magazine. The bottomline was "you can always change your mind." I did. When it comes to QUITTING, you never know when it will be just the right time, even when you originally planned to stay forever.
The Art of QUITTING, at best, is a glorious moment, when you follow your HEART. Goethe reminded us how it is done...
"Whatever you can DO or DREAM you can,
BEGIN IT! Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it."
Warm regards to you all,
Debbe
Author, Putting Our Differences to Work
Founder, Global Dialogue Center
Home of Women in the Lead
Follow me on Twitter @debbekennedy
Facebook: http://profile.to/debbekennedy/
